Tuesday, October 23, 2007

The Wall

I seem to have hit a wall when it comes to this blog. I was frustrated about it, and discussing it with my friend Stacey. I told her that I'd hit the point in my story where pregnancy was normal for 6 weeks or so. She suggested that maybe I'm playing this out in real time, and maybe when six weeks or so pass, I'll have more to say. I hope that's true. There is so much more of my story about my girls that I want to share. And so many tings that may become clear to me as I write, since that's usually what happens. Or maybe even just my admission of this will clear out my head and let me write again. I hope you'll stick aorund and check back in every once in while.

Thursday, October 4, 2007

Heartbeat

The following week I had another ultrasound to check on both the heart beat and the hematoma. The heart beat was higher, healthy and strong. The hematoma was the same. It would have been better for it to have been smaller, but at least it wasn't bigger. The bleeding continued on and off for the next 6 or 7 weeks, until the first trimester ended. At that point, the hematoma appeared to heal. The baby continued to grow appropriately, and I began to relax just a little, though I was still sure something else was going to go wrong. I bought a home doppler off ebay for about $150, so I could find the baby' heartbeat anytime I wanted. Seemed a small price t0 pay for peace of mind. I wonder if I'd have been so paranoid if I hadn't had a loss the first time.